Lent

Although my participation in Lent is a fairly new thing (2007 was my first attempt), I take it incredibly seriously. I feel silly when I write that this year I'm giving up chocolate. I feel like that stereotypical stay-at-home mom who grows fatter each day because of her pathetically cliche addiction to truffles. However, I do honestly feel I've entered an unhealthy relationship with food- and chocolate in particular. I've been using it as a comfort. If I'm upset or angry or sad, I eat hand-fulls chocolate chips or whatever other treats we have around the kitchen. Afterward, I feel extremely guilty, and though it's embarrassing to actually admit, strongly consider throwing it all back up. I am not bulimic, nor have I ever been, but I feel like I could easily end up that way if I don't make some changes. I need to learn and know with every fiber within myself that I don't need to turn to food for comfort.

My other unhealthy addiction is Facebook. I've decided to limit myself to logging on once a day. This sounds silly too, but it IS a challenge to stick to it. There are much more important things I need to occupy my mind and my day with, rather than hourly updates on what my friends are doing.

I also have two devotionals for this Lenten season. The first is Reliving the Passion by Walter Wangerin, Jr. I read this last year, and loved the journey it took me on, with Jesus, to his death and resurrection. The second is Writing to God: 40 Days of Praying With My Pen by Rachel G. Hackenberg. I am so, so excited about this one. It came in the mail today, so I have a couple days of catch-up to do. I've always expressed myself better in writing than in speech, and prayer is no exception.

I'm excited about this Lenten season. I know God will help me continue to grow into the person he wants me to be- free of addiction and over-encumbered by unnecessary things. The anticipation towards the celebration of Easter is growing, as is my desire to spend deeper, richer time with my Lord.

2009 in Review

For the past several years in my journals I've filled out this same Year-End Review. I think it's neat to read over last year's answers and fill in the new, to see how I've grown and changed, and now how my family has grown and changed. And so, in keeping with my own little tradition, here is my 2009 in Review.

Age you turned in 2009: 23

Was it a good year? tough but good

Where were you when it began? At home with Eric and Caleb, drinking champagne

Where will you be when it ends? With Eric, Felicia, and Laurence

What were your favorite moments? Spending so much time at the zoo and Library! downtown, both camping trips, BUYING OUR HOUSE, the rose-petal bath Eric surprised me with on a really bad day, seeing Ingrid Michaelson's concert, dance class

Did you have a New Year's resolution? Did you keep it?
-Lose weight - a little
-Eat healthier - Yes!
-Read 100 books - Yes! Grand total is 115!

Do you have a resolution for 2010?
-Lose 50+ pounds
-Read 150 books
-Find a good network of friends

Did you change your hair this year? Nope. I let it grow out.

Did you make any friends? Felicia

What was your favorite month of 2009?
May- for going to the zoo and Library! nearly every day
September- for going camping
December- for realizing birth-control problem and FINALLY starting to lose weight, and Christmas!

How many states did you visit? none

Did you lose anyone close to you? Thankfully, no

What were your favorite movies? Pineapple Express, Rocknrolla, Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day, Henry Poole is Here, Stardust

What was your favorite song? "Hey I Love You"

What was your favorite album?

What was your favorite tv show? The Office, Chuck, So You Think You Can Dance, Flight of the Conchords, Gossip Girl, Grey's Anatomy, Sex and the City, Project Runway, America's Next Top Model, Weeds, Deadwood, Glee (my goodness, that's a lot!)

What was your favorite hangout? The zoo and the Library!

Did you do anything you're ashamed of? Being so self-centered and bogged down in self-loathing. This year I want to love myself so that I can better love Eric and Caleb.

Funniest moment of 2009? Caleb eating dirt, and bugs, and dog food.

Most embarrassing moment? I can't think of anything this time.

Any new hobbies? still dancing

Did you get a job? Lose a job? Still at the bookstore

Did you get in a car accident? No

Did you get any tickets? No

What song will always remind you of 2009? I'm still working on this answer...

Something you couldn't leave home without: Diaper bag, library card

Any last thoughts on 2009? I finally feel satisfied, secure, and settled. Buying this house was huge! Keeping all my resolutions is amazing; I've never done that before. Bible Study and dance class were hugely instrumental in bringing me out of my depression.

Any plans for 2010? Continue hiking and camping, walking around the neighborhood. Generally living a more fit lifestyle. And loving. I plan to love everyone I encounter, and love deeper and truer- including myself.



So there you have it. This year I omitted some questions that I deemed redundant and unnecessary:
Did you get arrested?
Did you fall in love?
Did you break up with anyone?
Did you have a valentine?
I don't expect the answers to those questions to ever change, so why bother?

What about you? Any thoughts? I'd love to hear your 2009 observations.